I have been a military spouse for 12+ years. I have two children who have experienced 3 deployments of at least a year in length. I can say that I wish this book had been around for the first goodbye.A Paper Hug follows a child as his father is called to deploy overseas. It covers emotions and issues that are likely to be experienced by both children and the parent left behind. This is important in preparing children during such a life changing event. In a military family, it is crucial to talk to children about deployments, and what to expect. This is not always an easy task! This book covers quite a bit!

The story starts with the father being notified he was being called to duty. Mom and son gather items for dad to take with him in order to remember them. This is a valid fear for children- daddy might forget me- so I truly liked this as a starter for the story. It also encourages children to get to know their dad or mom, so they can put together a care package full of things they might enjoy while deployed.

The child in the story experiences a time where he just cries about the situation, which is a normal response. In this time, he figures out he can make something very special for his dad- a paper hug. It details just how the paper hug was created with simple supplies that many young children can handle. (construction paper, yarn, tape, simple measurements..)It even includes a poem that your own child can use to enclose with their very own paper hug.

The family says their good bye to dad as he left, and then a letter arrives a few weeks later. I find that this section is very helpful for children when forming expectations. Many younger children think that letters will come quickly, or that when a letter comes it will be for them. From the book, “Three weeks went by before we got a letter from dad. It was a long one. He told us about what he was doing, what the food was like and mostly stuff for Mom- BUT there was a “p.s” just for me-’Thanks for the surprise box AND especially the hug!’” This is easy for a young child to understand, and shows them that it may take a while, and you may not get a letter for yourself, but dad IS thinking about you.

The book even goes into the late or early hour phone calls that dad might make, and how mom will do most of the talking, and many times the calls come when the children are in bed due to the time difference. Yet again, another expectation is discussed so children will not be overly disappointed.

The story has the best ending of course, with dad returning home, and getting a real hug to replace the paper hug that kept him going for so long.

I have been asked to review many military related books- this one by far has been the most well done. The author and illustrator are a mother-daughter team who have sent family to Iraq, and lived through the experience with young children. The story is well written for a young child to read on their own or with a parent, and the drawings are done in such a fashion that a child can “get into.” Not overly complicated, with bold and fun colors.

Overall I completely recommend this book to be a part of the library of any military family with young children. Having resources to prepare the parent are wonderful- but having a book just for kids written in the perspective of a child, in my opinion, is just as important.

Review of A Paper Hug by Stephanie Skolmoski

“A Paper Hug” by Stephanie Skolmoski  and illustrated by Anneliese Bennion is the perfect gift for any child who faces the deployment of a parent or other loved one.

Children involved with the military whether parents, siblings, aunts or uncles or even grandparents have a lot to deal with. “A Paper Hug” helps children to understand many of the emotions involved in having a loved one leave them to serve in the armed services.

“A Paper Hug” starts with the father of a young boy learning he has been called to active duty. From Mom and son putting together a collection of things for Dad to take with him to remind him of them to explaining the waiting time for letters to arrive and phone calls that often comes in the middle of the night because of time differences around the world.

“A Paper Hug” includes instructions on how to make a paper hug which the boy decides is the best thing he can give his Dad – something to always remember him by and find comfort in. There is also a touching poem to add with the hug.

I have to admit, I cried reading this one. Being a veteran myself I know the pain of being separated from family and loved ones. “A Paper Hug” really brought home what the thousands and thousands of children of military personnel experience daily and my heart goes out to them as it does for the troops serving our country.

A Paper Hug…

MIA: Mom in Action
Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Before The Dad left for his second deployment, this time to Afghanistan, we bought a book for Bubba to read that would try and explain to him what was going to happen.

Thinking of her own experience sending two of her sons to serve in Iraq, the Salt Lake City resident felt it would be even harder to send a parent. She sat down and spent half an hour writing, and “A Paper Hug” was born.The book tells the story of a little boy helping his father prepare for a deployment. The boy decides to make his daddy a special gift to see him through the long months he will be away: a paper hug — cutouts of the boy’s two hands attached with a string.

“I just thought how awful it would be to say good-bye to your father,” Skolmoski said. “I’d already sent two boys to Iraq so I knew how hard it would be. A child doesn’t have the same idea to do something for someone going away as an adult does, (and) that inspired me. This is something a child could think up on their own.”

However, Skolmoski’s journey to publishing her book was far from over, despite the ease of writing the story. Her daughter, Anneliese Bennion, did the illustrations for the book, which took four months to complete, and then the two had to find a publisher to print the book as they decided to self-publish.

“As far as publishing and getting a copyright, that was such a journey,” Skolmoski said. “It took us a whole year to pull it off. We felt like we got a bachelor’s degree in submitting a manuscript and getting it published from start to finish.”

In June 2006, Skolmoski’s hard work paid off and “A Paper Hug” hit the shelves. Thus far, Skolmoski feels the book has been well received. To date, it has sold over 900 copies. Getting in touch with family readiness at several military bases has helped publicize the book as well as being associated with the Military Writers Society of America.

Despite the challenges, publishing the book has had its rewarding moments.

“It was really fun to get the proof (of the book) in print and stapled,” Bennion said.

Skolmoski cited three things she enjoyed the most.

“(I loved) opening the box (and) getting a review on Amazon from somebody I didn’t know,” she said. “The first thing I did after I got the book was to take it to the little boys who inspired the story, and they loved it. That was a big moment.”

Skolmoski and Bennion said the process of publishing their second book, “Operation: Celebration,” which is ready to be released, was considerably faster because they already knew the ropes. They are currently working on a third and, possibly, fourth military-related book. Skolmoski hopes one day to branch out from military books and just write children’s stories.

“It’s hard to find your niche,” she said.

From NJ C.H.A.M.P.

Monday 14 June, 2010 was Flag Day and the Army’s 235th birthday. With the help of a co-worker and some friendly Soldiers from the 42nd RSG at the Somerset Armory, I was able to visit some of the schools in Franklin Township area (4 Elementary Schools and the High School). We were able to enjoy the school’s festivities with honoring the flag and our military as well as we were able to share the history of each with the schools. Our NG Soldiers also brought a Hum-vee to share, show and tell with the youth.

To my surprise, the Elementary Schools had many beautiful, creative works of art to share with our Service members and their families. The youth put a spin on the book, A Paper Hug by Stephanie Skolmoski, which is a book about a military child who wants to do something special for his Dad before he deploys. After much brainstorming, the little boy stretches his arms out as big as he can to make a paper hug to send with his Dad so he will always have a hug when needed, no matter how far apart they are. The schools ran with this idea and made paper hug wreaths, posters, banners and flags to honor our NJ National Guard members that are serving and protecting our country. Above, you will see what one first grade classroom from Pine Grove Manor School in Somerset County made. Featured in the above picture are Faith M. age 7 and Rebecca T. age 6 with SSG Crespo and SPC Petrillo holding the paper hand flag that is taller than the girls!! THANK YOU Franklin Twp schools for all your love and support. It is greatly appreciated by all.

Mason Early Childhood Center first graders send paper hugs to soldiers Thursday, November 18, 2010 Contributed By: Mason City Schools First graders at the Mason Early Childhood Center commemorated Veterans Day by sending their appreciation to men and women currently serving our country– in the form of paper hugs. During the week before Veterans Day, librarian Chris Baumgardner read the book A Paper Hug by Stephanie Skolmoski to students during Media Center time. The story is about a little boy who figures out that the best gift he can give his dad who is leaving to serve his country is a paper hug. First grade teachers followed up with students in their classrooms by making the paper hugs. Students traced their hands on colored paper and cut out the two paper hands. They then stretched out their arms– like they were giving someone a hug– and cut yarn the length of their outstretched arms. Students taped the ends of the yarn to the paper hands and decorated them with their names and messages of appreciation. Elementary Social Studies Curriculum Leader Chris Lucas initiated the project and shared A Paper Hug with first grade staff. According to first grade teacher Carly Goecke, “We all thought this would be a meaningful project for our students, something that they could connect to.” Goecke, whose husband Jon is a sergeant in the Army National Guard, provided names and addresses of men and women currently serving our country, and the paper hugs will be delivered between Thanksgiving and Christmas, “when the soldiers will be missing their families greatly,” said Goecke. She said that when her husband was deployed to Iraq for over a year in 2006, her students sent care packages, letters, and drawings to him and fellow soldiers. “They said that getting mail was one of their favorite things because it made them feel appreciated and not forgotten,” shared Goecke. “Anything we can do to put a smile on their faces when they are dealing with things I cannot even imagine, I’ll do!”

On Veterans Day at MECC, first grader Meghna Iyer in Cassy Bethel’s class displays her finished paper hug that will be sent to someone currently serving in the military.